So I'm brainstorming about the whole becoming awesome at life thing... it's not easy. There are two ways to go about any certain thing. There's the proper way, which is usually more expensive, and there's the cross your fingers and hope it sticks way, which is cheaper but carries more risk. For some the proper way isn't an option. I've grown so accustomed to that, occasionally I forget that I can take the proper way. But, that doesn't build character.
I blew 43 bucks on a car radio at a wrecking yard today to find that out. No matter how much jury rigging I do on this damn thing, it seems like I can't get my radio right where it plays cd's.
Did the proper thing a few weeks ago and bit the bullet to get my brakes perfect but I cheaped out on a stereo today and there's no going back. I don't mind radio stations or learning something about electronics but I failed nevertheless.
Anyway, enough about cars. That's boring. I'm having a great day today otherwise. I got to strategize with my mom about vacation ideas, went to a dealership to nail down facts, helped a friend using this phone, and got some really great hookups at wrecking yards for non-radio stuff. And helped one Jamie with a party she was invited to.
And I had a few quiet moments this morning to assess my feelings on a lot of stuff. Busy people don't get to do that much. I've had this inferiority/depression thing going on for a while and it keeps me from being bold or even thoughtful.
I've been hinted at that maybe facing my fears is the answer to all that. Maybe it is. I don't want to show my ass or anything, but I don't mind giving the whole being open and careless thing a try. I've waited for this new car for a long time. Waited for the verdict in my career for a long time. It's awful just sitting around waiting and taking it when I've got this fire burning inside!
I don't want the fire to go out and the ashes shoveled into a bucket with one of those little flat shovels that comes with the fireplace set.
I want to come alive and try this whole American Dream thing out....
But how? That is another thing.
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